Best Yu-Gi-Oh Monster Cards (2017)
I’ve wandered the morbid deserts of the Dragon Shrine, delved into the seas of Atlantis, fought in the battle grounds of the Dracoslayers, and made cute poses with corny phrases alongside the Super Quantums, and you know what I discovered? Everyone and his (or her) grandma’s grandma has a list for cards they see as the le crop de la crème but moi. So, here I am, giving you an opinion I’m telling you is subjective but you’ll take as objective anyway: My opinion on the top ten Monster Cards in Yu-Gi-Oh as of 2017. Instead of weighing down hubpages like an obese lover suffocating his toothpick wife, I’ll change this annually, or instantly if I deem a card is worthy of more curses than a DMV run by sloths. So, without further delay, in no particular order, the most irritating Monsters of 2017:
Toadally Awesome reins supreme as number 1 in effect negation. Despite its ridiculous name and silly artwork, this totally awesome pair of frogs leaps miles above Apex Avian, Cyber Infinity, and other members of the I-negate-that-club by its ease of summoning and ability to add whatever gets negated to its owner side of the field. When one considers its ability to retrieve fuel for its negation by detaching and to recycle a Water monster from the grave when it finally croaks, and it’s not hard to comprehend how Toadally Awesome outpaced its competition in 2017. Big the Cat would be pleased.
Red-Eyes Darkness Metal Dragon
He’s black, he’s metal, he’s big, he’s mean, and he has red eyes, and no, I’m not talking about your Black best friend who smokes fire and listens to heavy metal. If you’ve played Yugioh in the last century, this monster has terrorized you at least once. The new ambassador of the Dragon Archetype, effective replacing Blue-Eyes White Dragon, Red-Eyes-Darkness Metal Dragon makes up for his lack of 200 Attack Points with the ability to Special Summon a dragon from the Graveyard or Hand once a turn, and to Special Summon himself from the hand simply by banishing a Dragon the player controls! Essentially, anyone not insane running a Dragon deck has him stashed away somewhere within the 40 card minimum. He’s easy to summon, keeps the deck moving, and has high attack power himself. The writer still wonders why this guy wasn’t made a Fusion or Synchro Monster… but then he remembers regular effect monsters need idols too. If you’re one of the young duelists in the game, be glad you don’t remember the days when they were off the Limited list. Oh man, terrifying times…
Gameciel, The Sea Turtle Kaiju
Japanese giant monster lovers rejoice! A new Godzilla, King Kong, and Pacific Rim in the works for theaters, people’s love for giant monsters has been renewed in popular culture, so it only makes sense Yu-Gi-Oh would follow the trend with its own archetype of monsters as dangerous as their big-screen equivalents. Sure, any card enabling one a way out to an invincible boss monster is top-card-material, but what if your opponent happens to be running a deck full of Kaijus, including their Spell/Trap support? Gameciel does what its other kin do by tributing an opponent’s monster to summon itself, but it can also take advantage of Kaiju counters on the field to negate card effects, a useful counter to a deck running Godzilla’s gang as more than a tech. You’ll pay a pretty penny for it, and then some, but having at least one Gameciel in one’s 40 card limit ensures one’s never out of options, no matter what all-powerful, god-tier card the other duelist summons against you, making it stand taller than most cards, including those from its own island.
Kozmo Dark Destroyer
We had to get to the current game changers eventually… There was no avoiding it. The flagship of the Kozmo deck is as frustrating as it is deadly. This large evil ship boasts 3000 Attack, cannot be targeted by any of the opponent’s cards, and Special Summons a lower level Kozmo from the deck when destroyed and sent to the Graveyard in any fashion. It can be searched by Kozmo Farmgirl, and any of the level 4 or lower Kozmos can bring it to the field by banishing themselves. So yeah, it’s impossible to have a top monster list without the boss of one of the current top decks. The only way to destroy it is to attack over it (Ha, ha, ha…) or clear the field, but even then it can easily summon another big ship or small Kozmo Town denizen in its place. This ship is solid.
Ash Blossom and Joyous Spring
Since the recent diminish of Pendulum power, the ghost girl with the rabbit has been usurped by her younger sister who dances in the spring, and it’s not hard to understand why. Instead of cards with blue mommies and orange daddies being our most feared opponents, special summoning a floodgate of monsters to floodgate your opponent is what’s currently vogue in the Duel Monsters realm. Ash Blossom stops all cards enabling one to accelerate their game, which includes special summoning from the Deck, searching, and sending cards to the graveyard simply by dropping her from the hand to the Graveyard, halting any progress harder than a steel door supported by bullet proof glass and a Whomping Willow. Her usefulness as an effective hand trap against the current state of game makes her one of the top cards of this year.
Things aren’t all doom and gloom with Links required to reference your Extra deck. A few Link-reliant archetypes exist, but all decks must now ask a Link monster permission if they desire to storm the field with more than 1 Extra deck monster. Until the game is graced with something other than beetle wrestlers, two-faced, popstar faires, and the denizens and wildlife from the world of Pulse, Decode Talker will serve as the bridge for most duelists to partially relive the Wild West days of the Pendulum era. A Link 3 monster that requires 2 or more effect monsters to make, Decode Talker gains 500 attack for each monster it points to, has two Link Markers to its user’s monster zones, and can negate a targeting effect by Tributing a card it points to. Since it doesn’t require the strict material conditions most current Link monsters do, it provides a solid Extra deck gateway for any deck, making it one of the best cards in Yu-Gi-Oh’s current state.
Number 41: Bagooska, the Terribly Tired Tapir
You said you don’t want to switch to Link summoning? Ha! Step on up, folks! Konami has the card for you… A simple rank 4 Xyz monster with a game-changing effect, Bagooska has some interesting effects when in attack position, but who cares? When in defense position, he changes all other monsters on the field into defense position and negates their effects. Yes, this Tired Tapir would be the stun card from hell, but this card’s defense effect does nothing against Link monsters, for they never sleep 0_0. Seriously though, Link monsters can’t be placed in defense position, making this Tapir with a pillow addiction an easy toolbox against any deck not running Links. So yeah, this terribly tired tapir is just terrible, Ivan the Terrible terrible, and you’ll soon get terribly ticked at him just as you’re getting terribly tired of reading terrible in this sentence. Until Konami releases enough variety to make Link decks more adored than others, this guy will act as your incentive, making it one of the top cards of the year.
Master Peace, The Dracoslaying King
Yeah, this guy is “Master Peace” all right, if peace is the silence that follows your field being empty. Many cards on this list destroy, but it’s rare to find a card capable of destruction while it remains immune to that good night itself. Our Wyrm King dominates with both criteria by granting itself immunity based on what card you used to tribute summon it, which can include Spells and Traps as well as Monsters, and can destroy a card on the field during either player’s turn simply by banishing a Continuous Spell or Trap from the Grave. Now, the writer bets you’re wondering how did this King take the spot of the Megazord with a name longer than Sephiroth’s sword? Considering the ease in summoning Master Peace in a Draco deck, you’ll definitely be seeing more than one during your teeth-chattering bout, even if you sit on it with a Kaiju. Until then, you’ll have to deal with its immunity and destruction per turn tactics. That’s truly frightening, and how this Dracoslaying King planted a flag on this list.
Most people who have tangled with these ultra agents making James Bond look like Johnny English know Quik-Fix is the card moving this deck on its mission to victory, which is why the U.N. limited spy agencies to having only one per site. However, the writer would argue when SPYRAL Sleeper hits the field, most players know their goose is cooked. As if Scrap Dragon morphed into human form with a grudge, this level 8 Light Fiend, who ironically shares the same level as his previous life, awakens by banishing three SPYRAL cards from the graveyard, and then can destroy a SPYRAL card to destroy two cards on its opponent's side of the field… during either player’s turn. Oh, and when you destroy him, he brings out a SPYRAL Super Agent from the hand, graveyard, or deck, just to remind you how powerless you are before the ADP, the Agency of Drilled Pompadours. Him being the powerhouse of the tier 0 deck of 2017 helps cement his status further as one of top cards you’ll turn into murdered-extra-number-two-thousand ninety seven against.
Shooting Quasar Dragon
Voted in by popular demand, Shooting Quasar Dragon still earns its slot by being one of the most dangerous cards adorned in white since its release in the Synchro era. Before Links hit the scene, all it took was three cards and a Brutality combo to summon this titan; after Links, and with the game’s current emphasis on tokens, it’s now easier than ever to have your opponent staring up this guy. Some points can be made for its newer relative, Cosmic Blazar Dragon, who negates card effects, summons, and a battle by banishing itself, but the writer would like to remind everyone, taking into account his prejudice for Wind monsters, most players will side against banishing because the current, most annoying decks use the tactic to get their strategies moving, and Cosmic Blazar doesn’t summon another monster upon it leaving the field like Shooting Quasar. When it comes to Blazars and Quasars, it’s sometimes better to stick with the old and let go of the new.
Which Yu-Gi-Oh Monster dominates the rest?
© 2016 Zeron87